When I was 43 I developed an eye twitch. It was a right eye problem, and the jumpy muscle was in the upper outside lid. It was an irregular irregularity, not occurring often and probably seldom noticed by others, but I was hyper-aware of it and very bothered.

I tried rubbing it and wiping at it and rinsing my eye. I tried relaxing, meditating, breathing mindfully. I eased up on the coffee.

Eventually it passed. And occasionally it recurs. Sometimes in the left eye now. Likely in the bottom inside muscle of the right.

I think the eye twitch is a symptom of being too stressed. I think I acquire it when I clench my head. Used to be I’d just clench my neck, with consequent pain and eventual physical therapy and phone headset, or put all the clench in my jaw, with discernable wear on my molars. (When the dentist recommended a night guard I declined, and instead trained myself not to grind my teeth awake or asleep. But sometimes I check and I find that I am clenching the muscles of my jaw without bringing my teeth together.)

I thrive on stress and coffee but I don’t enjoy pain. I increased exercise and decreased multi-tasking. The eye rarely twitches now. My neck is less noisy. My back, especially if I stretch it, appears durable.

But I must say, when that twitch starts, or when my neck stiffens and I find myself willing to turn my whole torso instead of just my head, I experience those as warnings that I need to watch myself, immediately.

My eye began to twitch in ‘93,
my jaw to clench, my temper to get mean.
At first I thought “Relax your neck and free
your shoulders,” and of course I blamed caffeine.
So then I tried increasing baths and rest,
reduced the coffee, let the jaw go slack.
I bought new pillows and remade my nest,
and found that I somewhere misplaced the knack
for kicking back. I lost it if I knew it.
Or never had it: maybe all was peer
appearance till the cohort aged and blew it.

I took a lesson from my dog that year:
to use what works and savor every pitch.
That’s now my mantra, any time I twitch.