When I was 21 I read the most elegant reasoning about honesty. I was into the fourth book of Gulliver’s Travels, and when the houyhnhnm expressed incredulity about lying – when he considered that language was created to communicate so what purpose could deceit possibly have? – I nodded my head more vigorously than any dashboard doll.

Since then I’ve spent some time mulling about language, and of course I understand that it’s a medium of communication, but I’ve heard conflicting ideas about what. Truth or lies? Business or love? Reason or emotion? Direct or subliminal?

Lately I’ve narrowed the question. I’m examining the question. What’s it for?

Clearly kids ask questions in pursuit of answers. Most of the time.

But adults? In addition to the rhetorical question, to which the asker already has the answer, and setting aside the sarcastic question in all its purposelessness, how do adults use questions?

Some questions are social tropes. If you answer “how are you?” or “what’s your major?” sincerely, you stop the conversation. Let’s set those aside too.

What’s left? Not much. I listen lately, and no one is asking about the other person. Everyone seems to be telling his or her own story.

And yet, I know we’re all voyeurs. Nothing interests us as much as other people, preferably our age group, maybe even our peers. Are they happier than we? If so, how?

We all read the tabloids, in print or pixels. Everyone I know watches some reality TV if they have a TV, and gets the same from social networking if they don’t.

It’s not that we’re not interested in one another. But we aren’t asking any questions.